Mad Mel Beyond Sugar-Tits

Well, you have to give Mel Gibson a little bit of credit. He had come this close to successfully rejuvenating his once mighty career. Then he made the unforgivable mistake of calling WGN reporter Dean Richards an "asshole" and it all, apparently, has come tumbling down once again. See, it's odd, because the only bad thing I see about the "asshole" comment is that Richards clearly appears to be a douche bag, so Mel just got the phylum wrong.

Here's the video of the whole thing, for anyone who hasn't seen it, mostly because I think it's funny:



Look, put yourself in Mel's place for a second (and also pretend you're not a borderline insane anti-Semitic with an obsession with ancient Catholicism). If you finished that exact interview and thought the camera was off, the first thing you would say about that guy would be, "Asshole". What, you think he'd simply chuckle and say, "Wow, that canny journalist almost painted me into a corner about my insanely erratic behaviour! Bravo, scoop, bravo." This is a guy who drove drunk, got pulled over, and called his arresting officer "Sugar-Tits" after spouting anti-Semitic ephitets that would make Hitler say, "Dude, dial it back a bit."

The real offence in that interview is the way Mel just sort of casually dismissed all the crazy-ass stuff that has gone on over the last four years. I'll allow that probably every single press interview he's doing for his new movie would be fraught with questions about these things and whether audiences would accept him again, and Mel is probably beyond tired of defending and apologizing, but shit, it's stuff he did, right? And surely those questions are fair game. I think they probably deserve a better answer than, "It was a long time ago, and I did all the sorries they asked me to, so just never mention it again." Nope. Not after Sugar-Tits.

The odd thing is, Mel's pseudo-comeback has made me hungry for early Mel; when we didn't know he was crazy. So, I went to Blockbuster to pick up Mad Max and The Road Warrior, two of the most kick-ass movies ever made. My Blockbuster didn't have a copy of The Road Warrior. As I looked at the empty space on the Action shelf where the film should rest, I thought that it was impossible; the lights were playing tricks with my eyes. That's like not having Raiders of the Lost Ark. I went up front, and asked the guy if they carried it. He, a nerd like myself, snorted back a laugh and said, "Of course, let me look it up."

A moment later he said, in shocked voice, "We don't carry it." I just shook my head at him. He couldn't meet my eyes as I left.

I went to Best Buy, where once again I found a copy of Mad Max, but no love for Road Warrior. Once agian, I asked a clerk if they had a copy, maybe in the back somehwere. Maybe they hid a copy to protect children, the elderly and people with weak hearts from the sheer ass-kicking vibrations that emanate from all the car wrecks, feral boys, gyro-copters and butt-less chap clad Australian post-apocalyptic punks contained therein.

The clerk had to ask me the name of the movie twice. I laughed, thinking he must be in jest, and said, "Dude, The Road Warrior." He continued to look at me blankly.

Then he said, "Is it a car movie?"

I replied, "Are you fucking kidding me?"

At that point, I was asked to leave.

So maybe the Mel I grew up with is gone forever. The Mel who gave guys a choice to saw through their hand or blow up. The Mel who beat Gary Busey so hard he lost his mind. The Mel who went beyond Thunderdome. Well, as all the children said, "We don't need another hero."